Friday, December 13

It happens only in Delhi Metro!

What is white and carries people around? No, not an airplane. What goes up and down and follows a trajectory? No, not a roller coaster ride. What saves thousands of people from the menace of the evils on the roads and the monstrous drivers driving the vehicles? No, definitely not Superman.

It is the Delhi Metro!




Saying on behalf of all avid metro users, we all would agree that we have spent so much time of our lives in Metro, JUST travelling from one place to another. Meeting that friend at Rajiv Chowk for lunch, going out with your girlfriend for a movie at Saket, having a shopping spree at Sarojini Nagar and getting off at INA, going everyday to college from Gurgaon to Vishwavidyalaya, having an evening of luxury at Khan Market, a get together with friends at Hauz Khas Village, watching a play at Mandi House, exploring the malls at Noida, and so much more, who thought doing it all would be so easy. So much so that one can even reach the airport or the railway station via our very own Superman, Delhi Metro. While travelling in Delhi Metro, one encounters a lot of different kinds of people. Here are some of them:

1. "Arre zara ADJUST kro!"

"Thoda Adjust karenge!" You hear that and bam, all hopes of comfortable travel evades your mind. Now you will go all the way to your destination crammed in a small spot, with a hurting back, jammed up legs and do I even need to mention the torture on your 'behind'! Though women are a master in this art, men do it from time to time too. Thin waistline is always the prey, huge waist, the predator. The trick is to avoid being on the junction of two seats, now THAT hurts a lot!

But there is NO solution to this, so all we can do is smile and allow them to invade that "ittu si jagah", while sob silently at the back of our heads!



2. The maniac on the phone!
We have all been there and we have all done that. No matter how much we deny it, we have all had one dramatic talk on the phone while travelling in the metro. We have all been that loud, overly enthusiastic talker which has encouraged a few in the vicinity to crack up. Sometimes we were laughed upon while other times we have laughed on others. So who exactly is the maniac on the phone? In a nutshell, he or she is the person who would have a very loud conversation, amidst the drop dead silence in the compartment, a few expletives will just slip out in the funniest dialect, sometimes anger will also override the talk, and most of all, the phone maniac wouldn't care one bit!




3. The Ring Tone fanatics!
It was 8 in the morning. Not many people riding, the evident silence. And then we all hear it. "Aaja meri Gadi me baithja, Aaja meri Gadi me baith ja", "Hello" followed. And everyone erupted in laughter. 8 AM had never been better!

Don't we all have that one ringtone incident? Since metro, very much like Delhi itself, is an amalgamation of people of any and every kind, one can find diversified ringtones, for a ringtone is nothing but a reflection of the person! Sometimes you hear someone's blazing phone and the song gets stuck to your brain all day, or you are studying for that very important test in the morning and then someone's phone just won't stop ringing!


4. Smelly people, smelly people, what are they feeding you?
Summer is a heartless weather, all metro users will swear by that. Delhites are not terrified of the hot summery sun as much as the jam-packed compartment with sweaty and smelly armpits (Yes, I too made the "Ew" sound while writing that!) Suddenly, all the affection towards metro changes to blatant hatred. Although we thank the lord for the air conditioning, sometimes that just is not enough!


AND THE REACTION TO THE "OTHER SMELL" (Please don't make me spell out farts!)




5. The meddling uncle and the tired aunty !
The meddling uncle is full of life. He is waiting for you to start a conversation with your friends and secretly hoping that he knows a thing or two about your conversation. When the time is right, he will jump in and offer his own anecdotes. You will be stunned, but hey, he will give you your very own 'funny metro memory'!

Coming to the aunties, BEWARE of the tired aunty. She will stand just infront of you, so that you can see how tired she looks. She will watch you with her big puppy dog eyes, she will make those 'I-am-SO-tired' sounds and she will keep shifting on her feet, hinting at the agony her feet are experiencing. If you are a weak heart, you will perish; you will fall under her spell and give up the hard earned seat. Handy tip: NEVER LOOK INTO THEIR EYES!

6. The X-Ray lads!
This kind can't be missed. Neither can this kind be escaped. Their eyes are constantly on you, scanning you inch by inch. It is like a human X-ray machine, their stare pierce through your soul. They don't look at you, they look through you!


7. Rajiv Chowk crowd!
Any metro list is incomplete without mentioning the Mecca of Delhi Metro Rail Corporation, Rajiv Chowk. Every commuter's nightmare, this station is the hustling and bustling centre of the city. Opening to Connaught Place, it sees a bevy of commuters on a daily basis. As we all lack basic civil manners, and really can't get the 'first out then in' logic in our heads, this station is a battlefield. Pulling up our sleeves, shoving the headphones in our pockets, and strengthening our hearts, just a few things we all have done in the metro while approaching Rajiv Chowk.


Life in the Metro is hard, but we are not complaining, atleast not as much as we do about inflation, electricity, water, Congress and Chennai Express. Our love-hate relationship will continue with Delhi Metro, but thank God for the humour it presents before us on a daily basis. Do tell me your Delhi Metro story or person in the comment box below!  

Source :- coolage.in